From children to pupils, four maladjustments are easy to appear.
August is coming, and the long summer vacation is drawing to a close. For the "Little Bean Bag" and parents who are about to enter the first grade, the rest of the time is full of expectation and anxiety. So, how can we help "children" transition to "primary school students"? What preparations should parents make? The reporter interviewed relevant experts.
Listening to the weather forecast and remembering the temperature helps to exercise children’s concentration.
"After entering the first grade of primary school, children are particularly prone to discomfort in four aspects: schedule, attention, self-care ability and living habits." At the 48th public lecture of Haidian Family Education Lecture Hall held recently, Xiao Ying, the principal of the primary school affiliated to Beijing Petroleum Institute, shared with her parents the experience of making a good connection between young and old.
Xiao Ying said that in terms of schedule, kindergartens mainly focus on activities and games, and there are not many teaching activities. The primary school has a systematic three-level curriculum, no special nap time, and the schedule is completely different from that of kindergarten. Therefore, it is easy for children to get up in the morning and doze off in the afternoon after entering school. In this regard, she suggested that parents should arrange their schedules reasonably and try to put their children to sleep around 8: 30 in the evening. In addition to going to sleep early at night, parents can consciously train their children not to take a nap or take a purposeful trip from August, so that children can gradually get used to not taking a nap.
Xiao Ying also found that primary school students who have just entered the first grade still have problems such as not being able to dress themselves, tie their shoelaces, pack their schoolbags, not caring for their school equipment and drinking water on their own initiative. She suggested that parents can help their children master their self-care ability by teaching methods, deliberate repeated practice, inspection and supervision. At the same time, it is also necessary to cultivate children to actively develop health habits and etiquette habits that are suitable for primary school learning.
Lack of concentration is also a big challenge. Xiao Ying said that the concentration time of primary school students is between 20 minutes and 25 minutes, which is because the development of children’s nervous system is still developing. With the increase of age, the situation of inattention will gradually improve. Parents can help their children improve their attention in advance through a series of methods. For example, exercise concentration by listening to the weather forecast and recording the temperature of each city; Train the breadth of attention by listening to the extended sentences and repeating them. "These methods are mainly through language communication, so that children can grab words and keywords, thus improving their attention. In addition, you can also play games such as catching and throwing balls with your children to improve your attention. "
Don’t go to preschool blindly, which will easily lead to inattention.
With the approach of school, the psychological counseling center of primary and secondary schools in Beijing has received many anxious and confused parents. One of the topics that parents are most concerned about is whether it is necessary to "stupid birds fly first" and use the summer vacation time before entering primary school to find one-on-one tutoring or enroll their children in preschool classes.
Wen Fang, director of the psychological counseling center for primary and secondary schools in Beijing, gave his own advice from the perspective of psychological development. The most direct consequence of "flying first for a while" during the holiday is that children lose the patience to listen carefully when they get to class. "There is nothing to learn in class, and children are easy to stay. In the long run, it is easy to cause bad habits of inattention. When it comes to in-depth and difficult parts, children are not willing to listen. "
Chu Zhaohui, a researcher at the China Academy of Educational Sciences, said that parents should take a long-term view in terms of children’s growth and development. He told reporters that there is a famous "twin climbing stairs" experiment in psychology: let a pair of identical twins practice climbing stairs, and one of them starts practicing in the 48 th week after birth and practices for 10 minutes every day; The other started the same training at the 53rd week after birth. At 54 weeks, one child practiced for 7 weeks, while the other only practiced for 2 weeks. So, which of the two children climbs the stairs at a higher level? The experimental results are unexpected. Children who have only practiced for two weeks can climb stairs faster. "Therefore, some training institutions claim that after training, children are more focused and their memory is enhanced compared with untrained children. In fact, such a comparison is of no value to children’s growth and development, because some abilities can be naturally developed by children after a certain period of time. "
Li Zhuo, the lifelong honorary principal of Beijing Shijia Primary School, specially wrote a parent handbook "Welcome to Grade One" for parents who are facing young convergence. He introduced that in some countries in East Asia and Europe, children began to attend the first grade at the age of 5. What is the purpose of 5-year-old children trying to learn in class? In order to understand the rules of the classroom and sit still in the classroom. From this point of view, it is still very valuable to enter the preschool training place to experience it. However, it should be noted that the preschool class is to feel the upcoming classroom learning style in advance, rather than to receive the knowledge of the first and second grades of primary school in advance. In addition, another important role of preschool classes is to let children show some possible problems in advance in the upcoming primary school life. In this way, parents can be reminded in time so as to find countermeasures earlier.
Excessive expectation and extreme weariness of learning, and school attitude reflects family problems.
Taotao is going to primary school soon. Within a few days of receiving the notice, the school organized entrance education to help them know the new environment they will study in advance and know their future classmates. Unexpectedly, after entering the school, he added a new habit in this holiday: grinding his grandfather to go to his new school every day. When the school is closed during the holidays, he just looks at the door for half a day. The scorching sun often makes him sweat all over, but grandpa can’t even persuade him to go to a cool place. Grandpa was distressed and helpless, so he had to find the psychological counseling center of primary and secondary schools in Beijing. "Is my grandson sick?"
Contrary to surging, there is another extreme who comes to the psychological counseling center of primary and secondary schools in Beijing: in the distant home, "going to school" has almost become a taboo topic at home. As long as someone mentions going to primary school, Yao Yao immediately turns his face and cries and makes trouble. Mom and dad are very worried. "I’m tired of learning like this before I go to school. What can I do in the future?"
Director Wen Fang said that both extreme psychological states need to attract parents’ attention. Generally speaking, the extreme expectation of going to school shows that children feel the lack of emotion in the family. "Adults at home pay little attention and have to look forward to looking for attention in the new environment outside." He reminded that children in this situation are easy to "make bad friends" and are eager to find channels for emotional communication and venting, so "bad companions" have an opportunity.
However, children’s mentality of avoiding going to school reflects the opposite state. "This kind of child tends to rely too much on family ties, which is not conducive to the child’s transformation from a natural person to a social person." Wen Fang suggested that in this case, the family environment and work standards should strive to be in line with the school. Parents should not do everything, but encourage their children to take the first step independently.
Who is in charge of children’s schooling? Consistency in family education is very important.
Recently, the psychological counseling center of primary and secondary schools in Beijing has also received counseling from many family groups. Before the children went to school, there were signs of internal family wars. Take Nuo Nuo’s family as an example. Parents’ commuting time conflicts with school time, so they can’t pick up and drop off, so they have to leave this arduous task to their grandparents. Unexpectedly, my grandparents insisted on one point: "Since the children are here, we have to listen to everything, and parents have to give up." The two sides couldn’t talk it over, so they came to the consultation center for expert help.
Director Wen Fang said that a very important principle in family education is "consistency". He put forward several four-word principles: division of labor and cooperation, cooperation and co-management; Close contact to enhance trust; Actively demonstrate and comply with regulations; Grasp the principle and give priority to development.
In fact, parents who have no time to take care of their children full-time do not need to feel sorry and worry too much. A previous survey report by the Family Education Committee of China Education Association showed that grandparents’ participation in parenting would not adversely affect the parent-child relationship between parents and children; If grandparents only partially participate in children’s upbringing and do not play a leading role in it, it will not have a negative impact on children’s adaptability to life.
In the handbook for parents, President Li Zhuo also analyzed the question of "who will take care of the children". Nowadays, most of the young parents work full-time. At the beginning of school, most parents will discuss who has more flexible working hours and who has more energy after work, who will mainly manage the children’s study. "It is important to have available time and energy, but over the years, after contacting many parents with different personalities and different communication methods, I think the best choice criterion for this matter is: who is more willing to take care of the children." President Li Zhuo said.
Li Zhuo said that because of the will, it is easier to find management methods, spend more time observing children, have more patience to communicate with children, and help children sum up rules and skills. If, unfortunately, the party who is more willing to do it is busy, then the two sides can negotiate a good division of labor after full discussion. For example, after a plan is made, it will be implemented by the party with more time, and the children will continue to feedback and adjust each other during the learning process until they find the most suitable rhythm and form of family learning. (Reporter Niu Weikun)

